#29: How do I talk to my kid's docs?
In this episode we discuss…
a listener question about how to effectively request that family members, doctors, and others refrain from commenting on her five-month-old baby’s shape or size and using language like “big girl” to describe her (even jokingly)
What dialectical behavioral therapy (dbt) is and what it is used for
the four categories of dbt skills: emotional regulation, distress tolerance, mindfulness, and interpersonal effectiveness
why these skills are useful for all parents
Using the “dearman” skill when making a request or resolving a conflict
how many listeners have similar questions about how to address non-body-positive language with loved ones while maintaining the relationship
walking through how to use dearman to address the pediatrician in the listener question
d: describe, e: express, a: assert, r: reinforce
M: (stay) mindful, a: appear confident, N: negotiate
examples, challenges, and ideas for each stage of the conversation, including why many people struggle with the “assert” step in dearman
how using dearman and effective communication doesn’t come naturally to many of us
ideas for planning and rehearsing your conversation in advance to build confidence and effectiveness
benefits to your kids who see you modeling effective communication
It’s just Zoë and Leslie this week, answering a listener question about how to ask family members and her pediatrician not to make comments about her five-month-old baby’s shape or size. We use a skill from DBT (Dialectical Behavioral Therapy) to walk through an effective strategy for communicating this request, and brainstorm together possible solutions for issues that could come up.